Kayla Renee

Hi, I’m Kayla and I’m a Return-a-Holic

Story TellingKayla FarhangComment
Confessions_Return.jpg

Are return policies ruining your life?

I’m guessing you're laughing at your computer, “Are you kidding me? I need return policies.  I couldn’t live without them.  I don’t even shop somewhere unless I know I can return things!   You’re crazy lady, return policies are the best thing since sliced bread!”

I lovingly and politely agree to disagree and let me tell you why.

Let me start from the beginning and first admit to you that I am a recovering return-a-holic.  

I realized my life had become unmanageable to my compulsion recently when I was looking at the goals I had written out for my life, things I wanted to do or learn or accomplish.  They included things like: meditate daily, take a pottery class, cook dinner more often, etc.

And then I looked at my day.  How had I just spent my day?  Well I did not meditate or work out or sign up for that pottery class.  I bought things and I returned things. Bed, Bath & Beyond, Target, Nordstrom, Zara, returns to the UPS store (from online shopping), etc.  A race to get all these things returned before my 30 days were up. 

This is what I did. It consumed (literally and figuratively) almost my entire day.

And I am not alone.  I would roughly estimate 80-90% of my clients and friends are stuck in the same buy-return cycle.  We are constantly buying and returning.

Even as we mindlessly scroll through Facebook and Instagram we are shopping.  If you follow an Instagramer with over 15,000 followers, I promise you, you are shopping.  And notice how Facebook has those shoes you’ve been eyeing hovering in the right-hand corner of your feed?

But, I digress.  Return policies.  Specifically for clothes.  Bad.  Horrible.  Serious time sucker.

Why?

Let me break it down.  You set aside some time to go shopping.  Or more realistically, you don’t.  You squeeze it into your day between work and kids and homework.

You don’t really even know what you’re shopping for, but you know you need some new clothes.  You’ve just stared at your totally full closet and determined you have “nothing to wear”.  So here you are, in the store with limited time. You’ve found a couple of items.  You try them on.  You like a couple (maybe), but do you looooove them?  You’re not sure.  You think you do.  Then the magic words come pouring into your mind, “well, I’ll just buy it and if I don’t like it, I’ll return it”.  

You know immediately this isn’t the answer, but you do it anyway.

You feel happy-ish with your new purchases and the whole drive home you wonder if you’ve found the perfect new shirt (or whatever it was).  The bag goes on the floor in your closet.  Maybe you actually hang the clothes up.  Maybe you try it on for a friend/sister/daughter to get their opinion.  Or maybe it just sits in the bag.  Until day 25.  Return day is nearing.  It’s now or never.  You really need to decide.  You try it on again.  Over yoga pants and a sports bra. 

I”m just not loving it. 

“Well it must not be right then”, you tell yourself.  And you throw the bag back in your car.  As you’re driving back to the store you berate yourself, “why do I always do this?”  “I’m so ridiculous” “why can’t I just find something that I like?”  “nothing looks good on me”  “maybe if I just lost a little bit more weight”, etc.  The mental berating continues.

Then you arrive at the store.  As you’re walking to the checkout counter, you pass a cute top.  You love it.  You think.  You say to yourself, “you know what, I don’t have time to try it on, but I’m sure this one will work great, and if not…..

(drumroll, please)

I can always return it if!

Do you see the pattern here?  

Do you see how much mental and physical energy it takes up in your life?  Lots!  

I speak from experience. 

If you’re still not sure if you’re a return-aholic, I’ll lay down this challenge.  Go shopping at a boutique that either has no return policy or has a return within 7 days for store credit only policy.  Can you do it?  Does just mentioning the idea of this cause panic to rise from the pit of your stomach?  If so, I think we know the problem.

Today you can take control of your life.  I ask you to make a vow with me. Repeat after me. “Today.  And everyday.  When I shop.  I will buy things that I love.  I will not return them.  I will break the cycle”.  

And the good news is there is hope. 

Creating a life you love all starts with your time and how you use it.  At the end of your day today, look at where and how you spent your time and if it’s not aligned with what you want for you life.  Make changes.  Today.

If you’re a return-a-holic, try these changes:

  • Return all clothes with tags still on them and put yourself on a a 30 day shopping freeze. 60 days if you dare!
  • When you do resume shopping, set a specific day and time aside and have a plan for what you really need to buy.
  • If you need help making decisions, bring someone with you: a friend, a stylist, etc to keep you honest.
  • When you get home, take off the tags and throw away the receipt.

 

Kayla Farhang is a life stylist and motivational speaker that works with her clients to create lives filled with confidence, passion and purpose.

Navy + Navy = Love

FashionKayla FarhangComment
navy & navy 1

I've been asked so many times in the past couple weeks about how to wear Navy with denim.  Navy is one of my favorite colors for fall and there are definitely ways you can pair navy with a dark denim, you normally just have to break up the colors with a belt.  I personally love wearing navy on navy.  I have a pair of navy waxed denim cigarette pants and more often than not, I pair it with a navy shirt.  It's a very chic combo and a nice alternative to wearing all black.

navy on navy 2
navy on navy 3
navy on navy 4

Plaid + Stripes, Oh My

FashionKayla FarhangComment
how to wear plaid and stripes 1

I was invited to speak to a group of women this past weekend about fashion, style and beauty.  As always, I feel like I walked away with more than I gave.  My favorite story came from a 70 year old woman wearing beautiful black boots with a 4 inch heel.  She said when she met up with her high school friends for lunch they said, "don't you know you're too old to be wearing shoes like that?" and she quickly came back with, "funny, they didn't ask for my ID when I bought them".   Such a lovely reminder that age is just a number and fashion and beauty should be celebrated at any ages.

how to wear plaid and stripes 2

I always love when I have an event because I tend to have more fun with my wardrobe and since I was speaking about the importance of having fun with fashion...mixing stripes and plaid seemed like a natural choice.  When mixing patterns, it's always important to stay in the same family.  So navy + cream stripes go well with navy/cream/yellow/green plaid pants.

how to wear plaid and stripes 3

Can we also talk for a moment about my new favorite designer Clare V.?  She has my favorite sunglasses and bags at the moment.  And to my delight, I just learned a store opened right down the street from me!  

how to wear stripes and plaid 4

Zara Sweater Top: $49

Juicy Couture Plaid Trousers (last year): (similar here) & (here)

Zara Bag (last year): similar here, $100

Clare V. 'Nice' Sunglasses, $195

Zara shoes (last year): similar here, $90

Building a Closet You Love: Start with the Basics

FashionKayla FarhangComment

While I love posting about fun and exciting wardrobe choices, the truth of the matter is most days I can be seen wearing any number of my go-to basics: a silk top, great denim, a well cut blazer, etc.  The two things that they all have in common is that they're comfortable and effortless.  Here's an interesting scientific fact.  While most people think they like variety, we all tend to eat or wear or do the same things over and over again.  So, the first step to building a closet you love is to acknowledge the things you like to wear and invest in those pieces.

basics2.jpg

My first basic that I invest in are white or cream tops.  I'm always drawn to them above black, gray or color.  To me, I always feel they look crisp and bright, so I decided to invest in 5 or 6 white/cream shirts that I love and fit well.  My second investment piece is a great fitting blazer.  You can throw it over a tank and put on a pair of jeans and feel great.  I love the gold detailing on this one and the winter white color seemed perfect for the fall.

basics3.jpg

And finally, a great fitting pair of jeans is a must.  If you have 10 pair in your closet, let's be honest, you wear at the most 3 of them.  Why not toss the rest?  As a twist, I added these leather shorts as my fall/winter basic for the season.  Temperatures in the 70s or 80s are very common in LA, so wearing shorts is a realistic and fun way to get dressed for fall/winter.  If temperatures ever drop below the 70s, I might actually be able to throw some tights and booties on with these.

Plaid + Leopard + Neon

FashionKayla FarhangComment
IMG_3285.jpg

I've been talking to so many women lately who just want something cute to run around town in and I get it, I'm the same way.  This is one of my go-to looks to just grab, go and get out the door.  I normally wear my leopard flats with this, but they have sadly gone to shoe heaven, so I'm wearing my leopard heels instead until I find my new replacements.  When you think plaid shirt and jeans, you probably think boring...I know, me too.  But add a fun bag, shoe or belt and all of sudden you have an "outfit", a "look", a "style" and you will feel much better because of it!  I mean, look at me, it made me strike this pose!

Neon and Plaid
Neon and Plaid 2

When I Grow Up: My Passion Project

When I Grow UpKayla FarhangComment

Hi guys!  I'm SO excited to announce the launch of my passion project, "When I Grow Up".  This will be a series of interviews with people who I think have some of the coolest jobs on the planet.  Why am I doing this?  Well, as most of you know, I quit my corporate job at the age of 29 to pursue a career I was passionate about.  Many people have asked me how I did it, so this is for them.  It's also for everyone graduating high school or college who want to know more about creative careers and what else is out there other than the ones we all know about: doctor, lawyer, accountant, etc.  It's also for my 29 year old self who googled, "people who have quit their jobs and found success" and found nothing.  What you'll find in these videos are people being honest about their struggles and self doubt, taking bold chances, going for their dreams when everyone warned them against it.  This project is for the dreamers...that's right, I said it.

weddingphotographer.jpg

I didn't even have to think about who my first subject would be.  I met Laura Grier about 10 years ago and have watched her career grow from an assistant at a photography studio to a wedding photographer to a highly sought after destination wedding photographer.  Her Facebook page is filled with THE MOST beautiful photos from all over the world and if I could trade shoes with her for a day...or a week...or a year, I would!

destinationwedding.jpg

In our interview we talk about her struggles to get her career started (winning prize money from reality TV and game shows to afford to pay rent and buy her first camera), to making the switch from wedding photographer to destination wedding photographer, to the importance of knowing your brand and owning it.

photography.jpg

If you know anyone who is interested in making a photography a career, please forward and if you have any careers you want to know about, let me know and I'll add it to my list!

If you want to know more about Laura or to just gawk over her gorgeous photos: www.beautifuldayphotography.com  http://wanderlustbylauragrier.com

Fall Into Summer!

FashionKayla FarhangComment
fallpreview1

It's 85 degrees outside, but guess what?  I am SO SICK of my summer clothes!  I'm ready to move on to fall pieces already.  And while I still argue it's too soon for pumpkin lattes, I definitely think we can start incorporating some fall colors into the mix...like this gorgeous burgundy waxed skirt that you've already seen me wear once this week.  And I'm absolutely obsessed with my new #OBSESSED tee.  Yes, it's $68 and yes, that's a lot for me...but let me be honest with you, I've already worn it 3 times since I bought it 7 days ago, so I think I'll get my money's worth.

fallintosummer
fallintosummer2